13 Honest Lessons Being a New Mom Has Taught Me

13 Things Being a new mom has taught me crunchy canadian mama blog natural parenting

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I have only been a mom for 13 short months.  Time has flown, days blend into each other and even the long sleepless nights have accumulated quickly.  I can’t believe it’s only been 13 months. It feels like E has been a part of our lives forever. Being a new mom has taught me many things.

I have learned more in the last 13 months than any other time period in my life. I have learned about myself, being a mother, keeping a tiny human living and thriving, my relationship with Jason, my relationship with others and so so much more. It’s staggering to try and put it all together.

To be honest, I don’t think I’m even capable of grasping it completely but I would like to share with you a few things I have learned.

 

13 Things Being a new mom has taught me crunchy canadian mama blog natural parenting

Being A New Mom Has Taught Me:

 

1) Your Perspective Will Change, on EVERYTHING

 

Music, food, politics, cleaning products, clothing, TV, books, how you feed a baby, how other people feed their baby, diapers… (I could keep going for ever, but you get the picture.) These may seem to have nothing in common until you become a parent.  As a parent, my perspective and thoughts have changed on every single one of these subjects.  

All of a sudden we listen to country and kids songs vs. metal. I cringe at the thoughts of using commercial cleaning products when I used to seek out and buy the best smelling, strongest cleaners I could find. Before E, I never even realized there were different ways to feed your baby; I thought every baby started with cereal and purees. 

When my niece was born, I remember telling my sister “You better get her sleeping in a crib, or else she will sleep with you forever.” – Now I cringe at the thought of having said that!  E has just started sleeping in her crib, and only for naps or first thing at night before we go to bed. I love co-sleeping and it has probably been what kept me sane this long! Read more about that HERE.

Being a new mom has taught me that perspectives and opinions are no longer fixed notions in my mind.  They have changed, changed some more and are still changing.  Being a parent causes you to question everything, constantly be learning and this causes your perspective on almost any topic to shift one way or another; over and over.

 

2) It Doesn’t Really Matter How You Parent Your Child

 

I’ll admit – before having kids, I had a tiny tendency to judge moms with naughty children. More than once, the thought “MY kids won’t ever talk, do, be that”. It was a passing thought and I didn’t put a whole lot of energy into it.  But, the underlying feeling is that she allowed her children to be the way they are.

Now, I have come to the realization that it doesn’t necessarily matter how you parent your child, they are born with their own, tiny, sometimes ferocious personalities. Yes, you can guide and mold them, but they are who they are from day 1.

E has had a strong personality from day one and has no problems showing it. Being a new mom has taught me that not only can you not change who your child is, maybe you shouldn’t try to!

Good one God, I get it 🙂

 

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3) You need a support system

 

Support systems come in many forms. From friends and family that are close to you and will help out, to online communities – they are all important and you need them. It takes a village to raise a child, and a tribe to keep Mama sane!

I am not one to ask for help often, but being a new mom has taught me that I can’t do it all on my own. I can tell you there have been times where I was so so thankful to have someone to turn to when I needed to!

 

4) Having a baby will test even the strongest of relationships.

 

being a new mom life lessons crucnhy canadian mama

 

Being a new mom has taught me that it doesn’t matter if you have the most solid relationship out there; having a baby will put your relationship through the wringer.

It would be a lie to say that having a baby hasn’t put stress on a relationship.  You both are figuring out your unique parenting techniques and a common ground so you can work as a team, the lack of sleep, and juggling your personal needs, work needs and keeping up with a house, all take their toll – on both of you.

But, that being said, it also makes you pretty damn proud when things start to click. When you start working together as a team, your parenting styles meld and things begin to feel normal again. You feel like you weathered a storm and came out the better for it. There will still be hard days, but be proud of the good days!

 

5) You are stronger than you think

 

From labour and delivery, to sleepless nights, to carrying 15 bags of groceries, a baby and a diaper bag at once. Whatever you thought you couldn’t do, you will. And, whenever you think you can’t handle anything more, something will inevitably arise to prove you wrong.

 

6) You are more patient that you think

 

I’m not a patient person.  I don’t like to wait for anything, I get frustrated easily and I bounce from one new thing to another all the time. 

But, being a new mom has taught me that I am way more patient than I ever thought. Middle of the night wake-up calls (for 13 months straight – and counting), sticking to a routine for E, getting hit or bit… all these times I have been called to be patient and rose to the occasion.

 

7) You are cooler than you think

 

13 things being a new mom has taught me crunchy canadian mama blog you're cooler than you think toddler fun

She thinks we rock SnapChat selfies 🙂

For all the stress a new baby can bring, they bring 1,000 times more joy. Being a new mom has taught me that I am cool – at least in E’s eyes.

Suddenly, you become the funniest, best dancing, most awesome singer and all around star in someone’s world. It’s an awesome feeling! 

 

8) You learn what really matters

 

All of a sudden, so many things that were once important don’t even cross your mind.  You learn that happy and healthy family is important, and that is about it. It’s liberating!

 

13 things being a new mom has taught me the toddler years crunchy canadian mama

 

9) Time is fleeting

 

Even the longest sleepless night you have will pass by quickly.  Every stage with your child is so brief and you will miss it when you realize you’ve moved on into the next one. Drink each moment in and cherish it once it is gone. 

It’s so cliché, but that’s for a reason! Time goes so, so very fast once your baby is born.

 

10) You suddenly want to have all the babies and yet can’t imagine another!

 

They are cute, cuddly and smell great! Within hours of having E, I told Jason “I could do that again”. They are a challenge, exhausting and sticky. Apparently I am backwards to most people but as time has gone on (and months of sleepless nights) I find the idea of the second more and more scary intimidating.

I am sure that this will fade and in no time I will want to add another member to our family.

 

12) Kid shows aren’t that bad

 

When it is all that will keep your toddler occupied for 5 minutes so you can pee and scarf down a piece of toast (maybe simultaneously – we won’t judge), suddenly kid shows are ok!

 

13) You are capable of loving deeper than you ever imagined possible

 

It’s cliché, but it is so true. And, no matter how many times you are told this is the case, you won’t really grasp it until you have a child of your own.

 

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43 thoughts on “13 Honest Lessons Being a New Mom Has Taught Me

    • I thought I was well prepared being the oldest girl of 9 children… but the reality is every mom, baby, family dynamic and situation is different so there is no way to be fully prepared for all the changes a baby will bring – just know that it’s so worth it!

  1. I love that You have more patience than you think. That’s a great one. I’ll never be a mom. But I refuse to give advice to anyone because it’s not my place. But I definitely love showing up with coffee to listen to my sisters and be a helping hand.

    • Yes! It’s not always easy, especially when she wants to read the same book 100 times over and I have a list of stuff I want to get to. I have to consciously make the effort to remind myself what is more important. Everything else will be there, this moment with her will pass too fast.

  2. Great Post:) Being a mom is definitely one of the hardest, but yet one of the most rewarding jobs! While things can get difficult at my house( I had 4 under4, so what can I expect!) you do forget those difficult days when your child says ‘I love you’ for the first time, or when they give you a hug, even just getting a snuggle from my baby, reminds me why I love being a mom so much!

  3. This is a great list! And it does get more intimidating as your children get older, to think of starting back at square one again, just as you are getting out of that mindset! I had 3, 3 and under, then twins five years later. Different challenges, but still the best feeling of love ever.

    • Right? From the very beginning, kids seem to have a way of making you eat your words lol 🙂

      When she was first, first born I also said: “Oh, it’s a girl?! Girls are so much more snuggly than boys” – WRONG. She is the most un-snuggly baby I think I may have ever met! lol

  4. This so so touching, and so true. I have learned so much about myself since having my son a little over a year ago. Number 10 is also very true! My son is 13 months and I’m starting to get ‘baby rabies’ even though the thought of having a newborn again is kind of terrifying!

  5. Hahah! I don’t have any kids so I can’t attest to these, but I am sure you’re right! I am often guilty of thinking “my kids won’t ever behave like that” so I am sure I will get my comeuppance when I have my own little monsters. 🙂

  6. Megan mccoig says:

    I’m not a mother myself but can imagine all of these would become apparent. Definitely every parent should have a support system!

  7. I am not a mom yet, although I feel like a mom sometimes!! I am the oldest of three girls both of my sisters already have children and I have seen their experience as mothers and both have had a different experience. Since they were little I always looked after them because mom worked so I had to make sure they were fed, had their homework done etc… and they grew up confiding in me for everything as oppose to mom so I am someway (I know is not the same) but I have felt like a mom. I know when I have my own child my experience will be different and having a child always changes your life completely is up to you if you want to make that a positive change in your life.
    Leslie Hernandez recently posted…Holiday’s Shopping Made Easy With Groupon CouponsMy Profile

    • I think being the oldest sister leads you to feeling like a mom already! I was the exact same! The oldest girl of 9 children! I definitely had felt like I had already been a mom – which, to be honest, kind of gave me a cocky attitude. I quickly realized that I definitely hadn’t been here before haha ;).

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